11.16.2016

Panic as Google Announces Ban on Fake News

The editorial boards of the New York Times, Washington Post, CNN, BBC and other mainstream/state media outlets are in a state of total panic after Google News announced it would ban fake news.

Google boss: We will 'work to fix' fake news

Chinese and Russian state media were also said to be upset over the new Google rules, while North Korea's Kim Jong-Il heralded the decision stating, "DPRK media only publishes 100% verified truth."

Along with the DPRK state organs, a coterie of shitposters and niche news outlets across the ideological spectrum welcomed the news. Many are preparing for surging traffic following implementation of the fake news ban.

The National Enquirer is expected to become a top 10 media site in 2017, with speculation the Daily Mail could become the most visited news site in the world.

There was confusion at the offices of The Onion, a publisher that openly reports fake news. However, The Onion editorial board believes it will succeed under the new rules because an internal study showed The Onion articles contained an average of 25 percent more reality than The New York Times.

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